What a delightful idea! The Collier Classification system for very small objects is exactly that. Non-living solid objects that are “visible to the naked eye but small enough to go unnoticed most of the time” are given a unique identifier consisting of three names. The names refer to such factors as function, colour and shape.

The website contains instructions about how to use the system and gives a number of examples.

 This object is called a Nelifrag Buildistabscratch metalipointisharpebiggerlik from its various characteristics

    Neli – never living

    Frag – a fragment

    buildi – found inside a building

    stabscratch – used to scratch or stab

    metali – metallic colour

   pointi – having one or more points

   sharpe – having a sharp tip

   biggerlik – resembling something bigger than itself


Go on. You know you want to classify something yourself. The instructions are on the Very Small Objects website.


When I posed the challenge to find strange museums, I hadn’t thought that the museum of airsick bags would be one of the great unusual finds. But here you have it – Rune’s Barf Bag Collection. Isn’t the web a wonderful world?

Actually, I was thinking about what sort of world it would be if my rules for the Internet were wrong and everything you read online was in fact true. I could use my Nigerian petrodollars to invest in the exciting new shares in the Mongolian mineral exploration company which are being offered for the first time. My unclaimed UK lottery winnings would cover the cost of my new university degree and of course there would be plenty of cash left to cover the cost of the vast quantities of Viagra and Prosac. And of course I would have no problem satisfying the horny Russian housewives now that I have a HUGE erection.

Hmm. perhaps I will keep the spam filter going.